Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
