They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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