The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
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