what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
vagina is talking i cant
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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