scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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