You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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