When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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