How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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