Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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