There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
if only i could text you this smell
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
