I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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