We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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