So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
