So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Randomize
