When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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