just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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