Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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