OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
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