smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
