Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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