He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
