break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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