Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize