I murdered the dance floor call the cops
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
porn star boner night. come get it.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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