3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
