1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize