I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
