help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
