my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize