Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
