he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
