Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
