I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I want her autograph on my taint
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
