People in love make me want to vomit
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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