Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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