i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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