Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
