Don't you send me to vm
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Randomize
