I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
