I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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