Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize