He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
