What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize