do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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