I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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