Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Randomize