If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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