I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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