i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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