the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
They have beer where we have blood.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
