She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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